Reflection

Anyone remember when I talked about the This I Believe project? Well, 8 months later - I've written my own. & it wasn't due to my own will. It was an assignment for my Emerge*AmeriCorps service year, & boy, did I treat it like an assignment -- fast typing, nit-picking, long hours of spacing out, procrastination, caffeine and a few tears.

I've been up in the air about posting it in it's entirety, but as so many around me discuss their New Year's resolutions, goals and dreams for 2011 - I figure - why not?

I realize, that as years pass my beliefs will change and grow with me. But here's what I've got now, and mayyyybe - writing a new This I believe essay will become my yearly "New Year's reflection". 

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While trying to decide what I believe it soon became impossible to distinguish what I believe versus what I wanted others to know about my life, opinions, passions and dreams. It wasn’t until I looked within myself – sitting in silence with my heart – that I realized – that’s it.

When in doubt, I sit with my inner voice.

While it goes by many names – gut feeling, Devine intervention, impulse, urge, or a punch in the gut  … I believe, the answers lie within one’s self.

I believe in the importance of growing in an atmosphere of openness and trust of both yourself and the Universe. I believe that the right answer’s lie within our very core. But to get there – you’ve got to have conversations with yourself. And further – you have to be on the listening end.

Often we act before thinking. There are many times which our inner voice is unable to shout louder than our fears, doubts, and other outside influences. It is not uncommon to find materials and conformity taking the lead. Sometimes, our inner voice is the problem itself– trying to disrupt relationships, jobs and other plans going seemingly smooth – it’s always trying to make you go one step further – or highlighting your wrongdoings.

But when we are not listening our inner voice – we welcome not only that achy feeling in our gut, but also disappointment, discontent, and unhappiness.

These are opportunities to learn and grow.

Saying I believe in my inner voice – is not a statement of believing only in myself. I believe that in the process of learning to trust one’s inner voice there comes a responsibility to understand and accept the voice of others. Not everyone’s inner voice feels the same, and they may not be linear to your own. When you listen to the core of your being and try to understand that of others– differences are hard to come by.

But when they do, they are not feared, but embraced.

Our own inner voices are continually growing and changing. Teaming with our dreams, values and beliefs our inner voice is a reflection the loved ones and strangers around us. It is fueled by our experiences, stories we hear, the advice we receive, and the hard work and flexibility we put into life. We cannot decide and act alone – the trust, input, love and experiences of others will help guide you.

Trusting your inner voice is also practice in accepting the connectedness of the Universe.

In listening to my inner voice I’m able to more firmly believe in the inherent goodness of people, the value of diversity, the right of all to experience joy, and the importance of imagination.

If only we all listened to the depths of our heart – I believe there would be more passionate people, more tolerance and significantly less hunger, slavery, violence and discrimination.

While I do not believe in utopia, but I do believe that if we all take the time to listen to our inner voice- we’d know how to respond.

In the novel, ‘The Alchemist’ a man says to the young protagonist, “Listen to your heart. It knows all things, because it came from the Soul of the World, and it will one day return there.”

This. I. Believe.